Threat-Proofing Your Child in a Dangerous World: A Parent’s Most Painful, Yet Necessary Responsibility
The Heartbreak That Prompted This Post
I came across a horrifying news story on July 14th. A school found blood stains in the washroom. Instead of investigating with care, they lined up all the girls—some as young as ten—and forced them to strip, even asking them to remove their underwear.
Yes, legal action was taken. Parents filed a case. The next morning, the entire school management—from the peon to the principal—was arrested. But I couldn’t stop shaking. Not just as a woman, but more intensely—as a mother.
That incident wasn’t just a story. It became a mirror of fear that reflected my own child’s vulnerability in a world that is supposed to protect him, but doesn’t always do so.
“Have I Done Enough?” The Question That Haunts Me
I’ve spoken to my 8-year-old son about body privacy, boundaries, and the difference between good touch and bad touch. We’ve had many conversations, using age-appropriate language, fun stories, and “what if” games to embed safety in his young mind.
But today, I realized:
It’s never enough.
The world doesn’t stop being dangerous after one conversation.
So why should I stop repeating what could save his life?
What Happened Today
My son stayed home from school today because of a mild cold. We spent the morning with storybooks, drawing, and light-hearted activities. I was determined to keep the day peaceful and cozy.
But the news lingered in the back of my mind like a heavy fog. And then, in the middle of the day, I did something spontaneous—but important.
I walked up to him and said:
“Rihu, why did you do what you did?”
He looked confused.
“Imagine I’m your ma’am. You’ve done something wrong in class.”
He played along.
“You shouldn’t have done that. Now, take off your shirt.”
And in a second, he started doing it.
My heart sank.
After all the conversations, the books, the stories...
He still believed that an adult in power had the right to demand that from him.
What I Did Next: A Teachable Moment in Disguise
I gently stopped him and said,
“No, baby. Even your teacher or principal has no right to ask this of you. Never. No matter what you did.”
He looked surprised. “But they’re powerful,” he replied.
And that right there was the dangerous belief I had to tear down.
I knelt beside him and said,
“Even the most powerful adults—if they do something wrong—can be punished. The court will not let them go. They will be jailed.”
“If someone ever asks you to do something wrong like that—sweetly or threateningly—you say NO. Or try to escape. Or, if you can’t escape, look them straight in the eyes and say:
‘My mom won’t leave you. She’ll make sure you go to jail.’”
I could feel my voice trembling with rage. But my words were clear, and my intention was stronger than ever.
Replaying the Scene for Reinforcement
A little while later, I recreated the scene again. This time, he responded differently.
He looked me in the eye, slapped me softly, and asked,
“Can I do this to them, mom?”
And I said, “Yes, absolutely. If they’re trying to hurt you, they deserve it. You have every right to defend yourself.”
I’m not a fan of teaching violence. But I’m a bigger opponent of teaching children to silently suffer.
What Threat-Proofing Really Means
Threat-proofing isn’t about paranoia—it’s about preparation.
It’s not about making our children fearful. It’s about giving them inner voice and power that kicks in even when we’re not around.
It’s about:
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Repeating hard conversations until they’re memorized.
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Practicing role-plays so they can react instinctively.
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Letting them question us, doubt us, and talk about uncomfortable things.
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Creating safety at home so they know they don’t have to hide anything from us.
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